i can’t handle the bald guy he doesn’t even try
oh my gosh it’s back
I laughed at this for like an hour the first time it was on my dash
The bald guy is driving the boat. It’s like he realized he fucked up and deserves whatever punishment Neptune deems fit
the fox news war on Christmas is insane. it is like a surrealist art exhibit every year. its a brigade of fundamentalist christian conservatives acting as if Christmas is under some attack when we are absolutely saturated with it the moment October ends (but as long as people who aren’t Christian are celebrating i guess it needs to be defended). it is newscasters turning to frothy rage at the idea of a festivus pole the height of an average person being in the same mall as a nativity scene. (warning: article is from a biased religious site) it is an adult human being defending the whitness of a fictional fairy tale meant to inspire children, deeming it necessary to assure kids that santa is white as if santa being black is something terrifying and awful.
it is just.
i cannot believe it is real. i am a white Catholic and it is still one of the most inane stupid things i have ever fuckin seen. im not fully convinced it isnt some elaborate prank to test what people will suspend common sense to believe. what a world.
i imagine that Beyoncé is off somewhere on a yacht, sipping on an olivia pope sized glass of wine, watching the entire world explode over her new album dropping out of literally the thinnest of air and cackling to herself with sheer joy. like, not only did she give you 14 new songs, but she gave you a music video for every damn one. this wasn’t just a casual troll, this was a calculated strike of nuclear proportions and she is leaving no survivors.